nothing will fuck you up as much as the realization that there’s no real reason the alphabet needs to be in order
dang girl are you my appendix because I don’t understand how you work but this feeling in my stomach makes me want to take you out
That is quite possibly the weirdest and most carefully thought out pickup line I’ve ever read. I applaud you.
i will never understand teenage boys ever because a boy in my gym class said he would feel uncomfortable if there was a gay guy in the change room with them and not even 5 minutes later he tried to shove a hockey stick up his friends ass